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Slave Etiquette - compliance with the judgement of Februaria court

 

womanworshipper Wed Jun 30 04:47:59 2004
   SLAVE ETIQUETTE

This essay was written in compliance with the judgement of the Februaria court presided over by Lady Violently on Thursday, 26th February 2004. The author thanks all the Ladies of the Court for this opportunity to atone and hopes that his work will meet Their high standards.

Introduction

No male slave can hope to write authoritatively on slave etiquette; at best he can try to distil some of what he has learned from his female superiors. Their views, too, may differ; each Lady has Her own beliefs and preferences. Consequently, this essay does not presume to set out rules of slave etiquette which are right for all slaves and all Mistresses everywhere and at all times. Rather it focuses on the sort of behaviour expected of male slaves interacting with Superior Ladies on the Temple web-site.

Even within the Temple, of course, different Ladies have different expectations which it is incumbent on those male slaves coming in contact with them to discover and meet; nevertheless, it is possible to identify some general rules of conduct. This essay attempts to set these out for the guidance of Temple slaves and in the interests of improving service to the Temple Ladies.

What is Slave Etiquette?

“Etiquette”, in relation to any group in society, is the conventional but usually unwritten code of practice for that group, or to put it another way, the rules governing what constitutes correct or acceptable behaviour for members of that group. “Slave Etiquette”, in the context of this essay, is the code of set of rules governing what constitutes correct or acceptable behaviour for the slaves in the Temple.

Why Slave Etiquette?

Why do there have to be rules of etiquette for male slaves? Basically because the Ladies of the Temple are entitled to expect some basic standards of behaviour from the males who they kindly allow to serve and worship them. Contact with a Temple Goddess is a privilege and therefore the Goddess is entitled to expect any male fortunate enough to be granted that privilege to be on his best behaviour at all times. She allows him in Her presence because it pleases Her to do so; consequently, if a slave wishes to remain in Her presence, he must conduct himself in a way that will continue to please Her and certainly not behave in any way likely to cause Her displeasure. The rules of slave etiquette give the slave some basic guidelines to help him ensure that he avoids causing the Lady any offence, irritation, embarassment or inconvenience and thereby reduce the risk of Her finding his presence undesirable.

Some General Rules of Slave Etiquette

1. Listen to the Lady. It states in the Temple scriptures, “The first thing you should all remember is how to listen. Always listen carefully, as if these will be the last words you will ever hear”. How can a male honestly declare that he is a slave if he fails to listen to what his owners tell him? How can he obey the Ladies of the Temple if he does not even listen to what they say? Why would a Temple Lady want to spend any time on a slave that was not interested enough in Her to listen to Her? Listen to the Lady. Every word She says is precious.

2. Obey the Lady. The main requirement of a slave is to be obedient. A disobedient slave is of no use to its owner and reflects badly on Her. The Temple slaves are the property of the Temple and may be given instructions by any of the Ladies of the Temple. Provided their individual owners approve, they should obey those Ladies with the same diligence and effort that they would exercise when carrying out the instructions of those individual owners.

3. Use all your physical and mental capacity in the service of the Lady. “As soon as you understand your command,” it states in the Temple Scriptures, “Obey it with all that you are”. The Lady does not want to be served by an automaton who blindly follows Her instruction, but an intelligent creature who will use its intellect and imagination to the full in Her service. Be creative in Your service to Her.

4. Be happy in Your work. Do whatever your Goddess asks with joy in Your heart, even if it is something you do not like. She may take pleasure in getting you to do something you find unpleasant, so you should be glad that you are giving Her that pleasure. In any case, serving Her in any way She allows should be considered a pleasure and a privilege.

5. Be patient. It is the Lady’s prerogative to keep you waiting. Keep in mind that your purpose as a submissive is to serve and to satisfy Her. She probably has more important things on Her mind than you. After all, pretty much everything is more important than you!

6. Be humble. You are not fit to lick a Lady’s boots; always remember that and do not go around bragging about your achievements. A Lady is unlikely to appreciate a boastful slave. Action speaks louder than words and you will have ample opportunity to show Her how good you are.

7. Do not try to manipulate the Lady. Often known as “Topping from the Bottom”, trying by whatever means to control a Domina and get Her to cater to Your needs and desires rather than vice-versa is not only rude but completely self-defeating. If you succeed, then you no longer experience the Female Domination you seek, only hollow role-play. To experience the true delights of submission to a Dominant Female, you must genuinely surrender control to Her with all your body and soul. As it says in the Scriptures, “Open yourself up, and allow The Goddess to flow through you”.

8. Do not bother the Ladies unnecessarily. In other words, do not be a pest. The Temple Ladies know how much we want to serve them, they do not need to be reminded of it every hour of the day. Introduce yourself and offer your services, yes, but if the Lady cannot use you right now, do not keep on at Her! Also, ensure She is looking for new slaves before begging Her to take you on. If you are lucky enough to be considered, tell Her whatever She wants to know, but do not witter on endlessly or pester Her for a decision. Slaves do not harass their Mistress, they wait patiently upon Her word. She will decide in Her own good time..!

9. Speak honestly and from the heart. Lying to a Lady is disrespectful. Tell the truth, even if sometimes it is difficult. When a Lady has bought a new outfit and asks whether it suits Her, and you do not think it does, it is tempting to lie because you think the lie will please Her; but if She has asked for your honest opinion, then you are disobeying Her by not giving it. She may flay your hide afterwards, but so what if that makes Her feel better? A little skin off your backside should be a small price to pay for Her happiness. At least you have not been disrespectful to Her.

10. Be realistic. You will not serve the Ladies of the Temple well if you are fantasy-struck and cannot tell the difference between reality and the fantasy world you see in books and magazines. The Temple Ladies are real Ladies with real lives and all the usual mundane chores that come with them; They are not on tap for you every time you want their attention. Try to merit their attention by helping them deal with some of those mundane chores and problems where possible and always remember: you are here to serve them, not vice-versa.

11. Be really submissive! Let the Lady take you over completely. Don't coach or second guess Her. Respect and obey Her and expect punishment if you do not. Accept it gracefully and cheerfully. And remember, never be afraid to crawl, grovel or boot-lick. A good slave can never do enough crawling, grovelling or boot-licking! Ensure that you have the Lady’s permission first, of course.

12. Be loyal and dependable. A Lady is entitled to expect total loyalty from the fortunate males She generously allows to serve Her. To show disloyalty is to show disrespect. She is also entitled to be able to depend upon Her slaves doing what they are told and doing it to the best of their ability. A slave is his Mistress’s possession and if the possession is seen to be of little value, this will reflect on its owner. Do not lower your owner’s esteem by being untrustworthy or unreliable: be a credit to Her!

13. Always offer your services if you can be of help. When a Lady requires assistance, She should not need to ask for it. The good slave will offer his services as a matter of course. As it says in the scriptures, “Be the first to offer help, and the last to ask for it, and you will rise tall as a glorious flower in the gardens of The Temple”.

14. Try not to draw attention to yourself. A slave should do his best to go unnoticed. He should not draw attention to himself or to what he is doing unless absolutely necessary. The good slave does not make a fuss because his Mistress’s cigarette is burning him; he bears the pain stoically. After all, She may wish it to burn him.

15. Be polite and courteous. No Lady likes an ill-mannered slave. All the Temple Ladies are your Superiors, so you should treat them with the utmost courtesy and respect. That does not simply mean saying “please” and thank you”, which is just “common” courtesy. It means that you bow and scrape and get down on your knees and grovel to them like the humble piece of dirt that you are!

16. Hold your temper and your tongue. Male aggression and rudeness have no place in the Temple. Slaves must NEVER show signs of ill-temper when in the presence of a Lady and NEVER make rude remarks in Her presence. If you cannot say anything nice, do not say anything at all. If you do feel yourself becoming frustrated or bad-tempered in the presence of a Lady, apologise and ask to be permitted to go away and cool off; and when you return, beg permission to re-enter Her presence and apologise profusely to Her again.

17. Do not neglect the Ladies of the Temple through conversations and activities that exclude Her, unless you have been granted permission to engage in them. It is very disrespectful for slaves in the Cage to hold a conversation between themselves which excludes any Domina present. The slaves are there to provide amusing and interesting conversation for the Domina; the Temple is not a boy’s club. Boys should always beware of subjects which may exclude the Domina and if one arises, he should check with Her whether or not She wishes to discuss that topic. If She does not, suggest a different topic or ask what She would like to discuss.

18. Do not be a wuss about facing up to your Mistress or any of the Temple Superiors. Most slaves have experienced times when they are so deeply ashamed of something they have done, or failed to do, that they do not want to face up to telling their Superiors about it. Nevertheless, they must! What you want or do not want to do is not important; you have a duty to confess your shortcomings to your owner or to any other Lady who has given you an instruction. Of course, the Lady may decide to punish you severely; that is Her right and you must accept Her punishment bravely and with good cheer (see below). The important thing is that you have done your duty toward Her.

19. Take Your punishment like a man. You may not actually be one – you may be only a male slave – but you must try nonetheless. The Temple Ladies do not like or cry-babies. Be brave, take your medicine and always remember to thank Your Superior for Her time and attention afterwards.

20. Ladies First. Last and always!

Slave Grammar

As the main medium of communication at the Temple is the written word, it is essential that the slave follows the accepted grammatical conventions when writing for a readership that may include Dominas.

Firstly, reflecting the difference in importance between the Temple Ladies and the Temple slaves, all words referring to Females should begin with a capital letter, whereas no words referring to males should begin with one. This includes pronouns and the use of the word “I/i”. Thus, where the writer is male and he is writing to a Lady, for example, it is not permissible to write: “I am writing in response to your last e-mail”. The correct form would be “i am writing in response to Your last e-mail”.

Where a group pronoun is used and it refers to males and Females, the usual practice is to write both versions separated by an oblique stroke, thus: “We/we”; “They/they. The version with the capital letter must naturally go first.

In fact, the rule “Ladies first” applies to grammar generally. Thus: “Mistress A and myself went to London”, not “Me and Mistress A went to London”.

In keeping with the rules that the slave should be modest and not draw attention to himself unnecessarily, some Ladies prefer the slave to dispense completely with the use of the word “i”; so instead of writing “i have finished my writing assignment”, the slave should write “Your slave has finished his writing assignment”.

As with other rules of slave etiquette, if a Lady prefers the slave not to do any of the above, he should respect Her wishes.

One additional point: the slave’s written communications should otherwise follow all the usual rules of grammar. It should not contain any grammatical “howlers” or spelling mistakes, especially mistakes in the spelling of the Domina’s name. Sloppy English is sloppy service and the Ladies of the Temple are entitled to expect only the best service from the Temple slaves.

Slave Etiquette when Chatting

Again, this is a particularly appropriate topic for Temple slaves. The Temple Superiors, in their infinite wisdom, have placed a brief account of it on the log-in page to the Temple site. Madame Gigi’s training session on this subject, which can be found in the Training section of the Temple, is another excellent source of information. What follows is based on both.

Entering and exiting

Whenever entering or leaving a chat room, slaves should generally beg permission to enter or depart of any and every Lady in the room. This should be done to each Lady individually unless permission has been given for you to do it collectively. The only exception to this is if the slave is aware that the Lady in question does not wish them to do this.

Until permission has been given, the slave must wait where they are and should not attempt to leave or participate in the discussion without permission.

The logic of begging to enter is that it is a privilege to be in the presence of a Domina and one which is totally at Her discretion to grant or withhold; therefore the slave must beg for that privilege to be granted.

Similarly, the slave must ask permission to leave as a sign of respect to the Domina. To merely up and leave without a word is tantamount to turning one’s back on Her, which is very rude, especially when She has granted the slave the privilege of being in Her presence. Also, the Lady’s desires are paramount and She might not desire him to leave at that point.

“Lurking”

“Lurking” is basically entering a chat room and not saying anything. This is highly inappropriate behaviour and can make Ladies uncomfortable. Madame Gigi said in Her training session that She views it as like someone spying on Her, which gives us a good idea of how serious a matter it can be for some of the Temple Ladies. It is acknowledged that a newbie slave may be nervous or overawed by being in the presence of a real-life Dominatrix but he should at least beg permission to enter, explain that he is new and/or nervous and ask any Ladies present if it is okay for him to sit quietly for awhile and just listen.
Ideally, though, he should try to put shyness aside and make the effort to converse. After all, the Ladies present have probably entered because they are looking for amusing or stimulating conversation and it is therefore the duty of any slaves present to try to provide it. If they are not up to that task, perhaps they should not be there.

Shy slaves should try starting with a simple “Hello, how is everyone?” and moving on to the usual small talk about the weather and suchlike. Anything that might interest or amuse the Ladies is a good topic. Madame Gigi suggested that a slave might even try making a joke to break the ice, though he should ensure that it is not an inappropriate one (see “Inappropriate topics for conversation”).

Asking a question or making a comment during a training session

Again, permission to ask a question or make a comment should be sought before doing either. This should be done by inputting either “?” for permission to ask a question or “!” for permission to make a comment. The exception to this is when the Domina asks a direct question to the slave or slaves.

Conduct

Slaves must always be on their best behavior when chatting, particularly if there are Ladies present. Politeness and courtesy are the watchwords. Slaves who are pushy, demanding, sulky, rude, aggressive or generally uncouth are not welcome and not tolerated. Think about it: you are a slave! you are here to please the Ladies of the Temple, not to offend or irritate Them!

Addressing a Domina

When addressing a Domina, slaves should make sure that they include Her name in the sentence. So, not: “Please may I be excused?” or even, “Please may I be excused, Mistress?”, but “Please may i be excused, Divine Mistress Paula?”

Slaves must also ensure that they show each Domina the proper respect by getting Her right. This means that if the Lady likes to be called Goddess A, then you address Her as Goddess A, not Mistress or Mistress A. If you are not sure how the Lady likes to be addressed, ask Her. For that one time, you could use the name that appears on the screen: for example, “Excuse me, DivineMissP, but how do You prefer to be addressed?” You should also apologise for not knowing. The good slave finds out this sort of thing beforehand so that he does not have to bother the Lady with questions.

Following the chat

If you are in chat, you should try your best to follow the thread of the chat. If you keep losing the plot and going off the subject, you risk irritating the Ladies present. You owe the Lady your undivided attention and must serve Her with alertness and intelligence. Concentrate! And should you be distracted, in SM or reading email and like a typical male, unable to multi-task, then you should let the others in the chat know that you are afk (“away from keyboard”).

Responding to a Question

When the Cage is crowded and there are several conversations going on at once, following a chat can be difficult. One way slaves can help to ensure that things do not get too confusing is by following the correct protocol for answering questions. Basically, one should always answer fully, referring to the original question and the person that asked it. For example, if slave b is asked by Mistress A if he has ever been to Canada before, the correct way for him to respond would be: “No, Mistress A, I have never been to Canada before”; not simply, “No, Mistress” and certainly not just “No”!

That way, no-one gets lost or confused. Remember, this protocol exists principally to help you ensure you do not irritate the Temple Ladies by losing the plot; Ladies are much better at following multiple conversations than males.

Inappropriate Topics of Conversation

While it is best to make an effort to participate and to allow others to get to know you, there are some things that it is not suitable to chat about in a public forum. For example, it is not appropriate when you are chatting in the Cage to start telling the Domina about (e.g) what you'd like Her to do to you. Sometimes if the mood is right a Lady may judge that it is permissible for the conversation to get a little racy, but that is a matter for Her, not for you and vulgarity is most definitely uncalled for.

Asking Stupid Questions

The Temple Ladies are very perceptive; they know that men are dumb and they do not need a particular male to prove it by continually asking dumb questions. Think before you talk, and do so with the organ in your head, not the one between your legs. Otherwise you will just irritate the Ladies and then you’ll be sorry.

Criticising the Temple or the Temple Superiors

It should go without saying that the Cage is NOT the place to criticise either the Temple or the Ladies who frequent it. If a slave has a genuine problem with a Lady, he should consult privately with a Superior, or better still, with the Lady Herself. This should be done with the utmost tact and discretion and the good slave will always consider anything and everything he could possibly be doing wrong before criticizing his Superior. If he has a problem with the Temple; well, he always has the option of leaving. Nobody has to be here.

Welcoming Others

All slaves should try to be as inclusive and supportive as possible when chatting. Try to make EVERYONE feel welcome. The Temple is a community that is growing steadily and the Ladies of the Temple want this to continue. So support your fellow slaves! Show newbies how things are done and encourage them to take an active part in the life of the Temple. Everyone has something to offer.

Saying Thank You

Finally, after you have had a chat with a Domina, thank Her for Her time. It’s the least that You can do. Her time is precious and yet She has chosen to spend it brightening up your miserable existence, you pathetic little worm! Isn’t She wonderful?

Conclusion

Serving the Ladies of the Temple is a privilege, not a right. If you do not wish to lose that privilege, then you must learn how to behave properly in Their presence. That means learning the general rules of slave etiquette; but it is not just a matter of learning one set of rules. Every Lady is different and has different desires and expectations; it is our duty as slaves to get to know them all so that we behave toward every Lady in a way which is pleasing to Her. So really the first rule of slave etiquette should be:

“Strive to know the Lady’s requirements that you may serve Her as She wishes to be served”.



__THE END__